The Great Paradox: Budget Traveling

The semester for los extranjeras has ended, and the question "So, where are you going afterwards?" has become the new "Where are you going this weekend?"  For some, saying goodbye to their mamas de casa also means saying farewell to their friends abroad, daily café con leche, and our beloved Sevilla.  I will miss you greatly, home-goers.  Eat some peanut butter and Mexican food for me, and watch a TON of American TV.

Our last dinner together...aww, I'll miss you guys!!

For others, saying goodbye to our madres means leaving our bags in their attics and setting off to discover Europe.  As romantic and free-spirited as that sounds, this is where it gets ugly.

First Issue: Sevilla to Santander

It turns out, you can't just "Go see Europe."  There are details involved.  To start, the plane tickets.  Sure that €6 flight from Santander to Paris sounded great a month ago, and was of course the best impulse buy I've ever made, but how to get to Santander...

• Plane:  My dear friend RyanAir, who tricked me into thinking I could just "go to Paris," in the first place, has suddenly become evasive and distant on SkyScanner.

  

  Maybe these guys could give us a ride...

• Bus: Delightful.  Make sure to buy the ticket in advance, or you may not be able to sit next to sweaty strangers for hours at a time, and could even have to resort to...
• Taxi:  Expensive, but not unheard of.  However, it's not recommended to take a cab further than home from the bars school, let alone cross (or to another!) the country.  
• Train: Chyeah, see you in about 5 hours and  €350
• Hitchiking:  Alright, I know it sounds crazy to accept a ride from a stranger on the side of a highway several miles outside of town who just happens to be going the same general direction, but my cousin Kevin did it all the way from Belgium to Morocco.  Besides costing almost nada, WOW, does he have stories.  So, it's not completely off the table.

I mean, we built a sleeping fort in the airport before...

Second Issue: Where to Sleep

After logging hours on convenient websites specifically designed for budget travelers, I have learned a few things:

a. There are a total of 5 places to stay in Santander.

b. Good luck finding anywhere to stay for less than €70/night in paris.

c. Ohhh, so you don't want to share a twin bed with three people?  Fine, that will be €200

d. Because of aforementioned b and c, we can't stay in Paris forever.

Third Issue: So...where are you going?

Our adventures* after Paris depend almost solely upon hostel prices.  Specifically, the cheapest place to stay...in Europe.  But wait! You have to get there first.  this is where it gets tricky...

Back to SkyScanner

From: Paris (any airport)                   To: Everywhere 

Results and Analysis:

Croatia is on their own Croatian kuna or pebble or something...so that means living there is basically free after you pay €250 to get there, right?

We could get to London for €23, but then they use the British pound, which is worth even more than the euro. This translates into...ballpark, infinity x infinity in expenses.

So no London.

Back to Skyscanner.

*Adventures could turn into singular adventure if the euro doesn't crash very soon, so my bank account can stop doing such an uncanny impression of a sieve.  "What do you mean, exchange rate?"

Fourth Issue: Storage

The one concrete thread in this international tapestry of travel plans is that I will only have one regulation-sized, RyanAir approved backpack with me throughout the 3 weeks of travel.
FACT: I have not been living out of a backpack for the previous four months.  Try my backpack, giant suitcase, a normal airline carry-on, pink duffel, and aaaaalllll the wonderful European things I've acquired in my stay here.

It's all fun and games until someone has to PACK.

Like, shopping in Sevilla is fabulous.

How do you pack a flamenco dress? 

Does it roll-up okay?

Storage options:

Airport:  €4/day.  So €4 x 15 days. Warning! Items left in storage past 15 days will be given to Lost & Found.  Neat.

Rosa's House: Free, unless you count the detour through Sevilla to pick it up on the way to catching my flight from Madrid to the U.S. 

Storage Unit:   €20/month, plus two trips through whatever metros, buses, and taxis with four massive bags to get to and from the unit.

Bring 'em Along: {*Sound of RyanAir laughing darkly as my debit card is torn into a thousand pieces*}

Perhaps this should be First Issue, because the plane tickets I purchase depend upon the mode of storage I choose.  And vice-versa.

Issue 5: It's Nice Outside

Please. All I want to do is play on the swings.

This would all be quite manageable, if paddleboating on the Guadalquivir, sipping iced café con leche in my favorite plaza, and tanning on the roof didn't all sound so darn appealing.  How am I supposed to focus on the cold, dark, money-sucking world of the interwebs when I could be outside playing??

Cue the deep, Spanish-woman sigh: ¡Ooehwei! 

First-world problems are just killer.